Let's face it: romance is about attraction. Be sure to use a recent, clear photo that shows your whole face--it wouldn't be fair for Elvis to post his "pelvis" pics during his fried banana and peanut butter days. Even Elvis wouldn't want to show up only to have his date not recognize him.
Just because you only get one shot online doesn't mean you only get one shot. Keep a folder of becoming, current, clear photos you can be ready to send as supplements in email, upon request.
Beware the brain's rose-colored beer goggles.
Subject: Tony Bologna. Dramatic, shadowy, three-quarter shot.
Viewer sees: Antonio Banderas.
Conclusion: Inevitable disappointment.
Results: Whatever part of your photo is missing gets filled in by the viewer's brain. The viewer not only sees what is not there, but sees it in the best possible light.
No-No's for Photos
Your "lucky shot"
This is false advertising. If by some bizarre accident, one of your photos makes you look like exactly Brad Pitt, this is, contrary to what you may believe, NOT the one to choose for your profile. You're thinking: This will get me the date of my dreams. It might, but only for as long as it takes for her/him to ask you, "Are you here to tell me my date couldn't make it?"
Professional headshots
At best, all they say is, "This how I can look--with professional lighting, pro makeup and a well-paid photographer." How about what you do look like?
The only one you have scanned
If the photo is old, blurry, or completely unflattering, writing, "This was taken before I had the warts removed," or "this was taken before the rhinoplasty" or "this was taken before my complete enlightenment" will not cut it. As far as online dating is concerned, if we can't see it, it doesn't exist.
You and...the person next to you
Whether it's your ex-girlfriend, your drinking buddies or a stripper you met in New Orleans, their picture doesn't belong in your profile. And if you are going to put someone in there, be sure to explain it. Digitally chopping out the image of your ex, leaving a murder scene-like human outline, leads to curious questions: What happened to his last girlfriend? All that's left is a few strands of blonde hair and free- floating fingertips resting on his shoulder. Should I inform the authorities?
Passport photos, student IDs and driver's licenses
They usually look like mug shots. Incidentally, mug shots are a no-no, too...unless you're seeking a new parole officer.
Graduation, high school or bar mitzvah photos
Bound to kill any sexual thought within ten miles. Looking like your potential date's baby sibling is not the kind of "cute" you're going for.
Photos more than a year old
These belong in scrapbooks, not online. You don't want to be history before you've ever met.
Baby photos
They may communicate a lot (you had charming dimples; you preferred the taste of blue crayons to yellow; your closest visible companion was Boo-Boo the Baby Bear), but they don't reveal one key point: what you look like.
"Creativity"
Stylized three-quarter shots from odd angles, overexposed pics that make your nose evaporate, half of your face (any half), your most beloved drawings, pictures of your cat, favorite superhero or hieroglyphics that signify the meaning of your life tell us nothing about the way you actually look.
